Today Is Christmas Day

We didn't have a lot to share with each other, but we had enough. We opened our gifts and then we had breakfast. It was a bright Sunny day but, it was cold.
All the kids called us to wish us a Merry Christmas and we called a lot of other family members to do the same.
Andy and Michelle came over with Amber and Austin to share the Holiday and some gifts.
Doris ate a lot more today than she has been eating, so I think maybe that problem is over. She still seems very weak and feels the need to take two or three naps during the day.
All in all, I think this has been a pretty good Christmas considering all that has been going on here concerning our health conditions and hospital stays.
So, all I can say is "Merry Christmas to all and to all a Good Night".

I'm Getting A Little Worried

Doris isn't hardly eating anything. She has lost 10 pounds since she came home. That's way too much for such a short period of time.
I am doing my best to take care of her, but I am getting worn out. Last night and a couple of hours this morning, I was getting chest pains and getting out of breath too easily. I seemed to be OK after a while, but it did worry me at the time.
Also, I noticed that she is becoming very dependant on me, even the little things.
I honestly don't know what to do. What if something happened to me, she wouldn't be able to assist me and of course, I wouldn't be able to do anything for her. That would be a real disaster.

As they say, "Life's a bitch and then you die"

Doris is Home From The Hospital

Doris came home on Sunday afternoon. The list of prescriptions she has is staggering. I had to create a chart to go by in order to make sure she was able to take all the medicines at the right time every day.
She is so weak she can't do hardly anything in the house. She said, yesterday, that she wants to do what she always did, but doesn't feel strong enough.
She hardly eats anything all day and I am really worried about that too.
I am trying to be the strong one through all of this as it's necessary to get things done.
I have to do the house work and work my job too. I am beat every day.
It's not going to be a very good Christmas this year as I too was laid up for 3 months with no money coming in. Now I am able to work, but I don't feel as strong as I should feel.
Thank God I am able to take care of her and do all I have to do also.

Life Has Been a Real Bitch Lately !!!

We have been really sick lately.
First Doris, then me. I don't know what we have, but it just won't quit. I am pretty much over my illness, but Doris is still very sick and it doesn't seem to get better.
We have beaten a path to the emergency room / hospital and the family doctor. No matter what they do for her, it doesn't seem to help.
She hasn't slept well in over a week and it's becoming obvious to me that she is getting weaker.
She is 71, but always strong as an ox. I hope that strength will prevail. There is nothing more I can do that I haven't already done to help her. The rest is up to her and her maker.
I don't quite know what I would do if she died.

I Wonder What's Going To Happen Next

Rachel has quit the Berry Tree for the last time. All connection to me is gone. She has said we are still friends, I really hope so. Down through the months and e-mails we have shared, I think I know her better than I might know my own daughters.
Life goes on and we have to accept it or die. I don't like accepting it, but I don't like dying either.
She has always been as good as her word, I hope she stays that way.
I'm really sad about it, but I will get over it. (I hope)

Doing My Best To Help

I am doing my best to help people that I know and those I care for dearly. I pray for all those that need it and try to get involved with the problems that they are having, but it seems like it's not enough. People are getting sick all around me and they are having other problems that I am trying to deal with.
I give my money away, I give people the shirt off my back and finally, I give my heart away. It doesn't seem to be enough sometimes.
My grand daughter and her son (my great grandson) are living in a house that is heavily infected with mold spores. This could kill them, but they can't sell a house like that and basically don't have anywhere else to go. I don't know what I can do for them, my house is too small. Doreen has offered, but, so far no one has said yes or no to that. Her husband would would have to relocate and get another job and that's tough right now.
My best friend, Rachel, has lost her downline in The Berry Tree and was totally shut out of the Autobuilder and Nutronix. I really feel if she sent in a "Ticket" to them they would re-instate her membership, but they won't rebuild the downline. So, I must take on that responsibility to try to do that, she must also apply herself to that end also. I have placed her in the same catagory as my own daughters or a member of my immediate family. I know it's a fantasy, but I really feel that way about her. That's what makes me feel obligated to do what I can to help her.
I will keep on trying and hope for the best.
Christmas is almost upon us and we are not going to be able to give the kind of gifts we usually do. Money is so tight and I was out of work for 3 months, which cost me about $3000 in lost wages. Thank god I still have my job to rebuild with. I really feel for those that don't.